Witty Baby Sam with a woman I was told is my mother

To tell you about me requires some REAL work and actually getting a bit serious – now that’s hard enough. Then add the exercise of unraveling the wonderfully constructed (may I add sparkly and terribly confusing)  ball of  fun that is me!

But it all started with the day I was born… some say it was a glorious event with fireworks and festivals on the streets around the world…but that’s subjective considering my mother was in labor for 12 hours and even then I didn’t want to come out – well, at that stage I didn’t like sudden changes plus it was so snuggly warm in there… besides I wasn’t asked if I wanted to leave. So a fight ensued… the doctor won out in the end. He had forceps… which I guess beats an umbilical chord!

My glorious journey had begun…

I did enjoy my first day in the baby ward. I tried to entertain the troups with some stand up comedy… I guess the other babies just didn’t get my jokes and I was eventually voted out of the Baby Ward – “Survivor” style. I was glad to leave… they were always whinging about something – “wah – I’m hungry!”, “wah – I want my Mummy! and“Is that smell coming from me or the baby in the next crib… oh shit, it’s me… for the love of God, remove my nappy – stat!”

She dedicates her life to spreading that gospel as part of her plan for world domination.

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